


backbone of night

by blazeofglory



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - No Voldemort, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-24
Updated: 2019-01-24
Packaged: 2019-10-15 16:35:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,340
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17532293
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/blazeofglory/pseuds/blazeofglory
Summary: When Sirius Black went missing, there wasn't a single shred of evidence left behind to find him.Five years later, on a dark, windy night, he shows up outside Remus Lupin's flat.





	backbone of night

**Author's Note:**

> Title from "King of the Clouds" by Panic! at the Disco.

There was nothing unordinary about the darkness of night, Remus reminded himself, though he couldn’t resist looking over his shoulder once more. His skin was crawling and he couldn’t shake the feeling that he was being watched, but it was just-- just paranoia, strange sounds from the wind, and a childhood fear of the dark that he’d never quite shaken. There was no reason to genuinely believe that something was amiss, so he kept walking, his hand clenched around the wand in his pocket.

When Remus turned the corner, just a block away from his flat, he stopped suddenly, his heart immediately beating faster and all color draining from his face.

It was like seeing a ghost. 

Sirius Black had been missing for five years, long presumed dead, but apparently that didn’t seem to stop him from standing in the middle of the sidewalk, looking pale and foreboding in the weak moonlight. He was dressed in rags, though the cut of the cloth looked as though it had once been something lavish, and he looked distinctly unkempt, but-- Merlin, with a shower, he would look exactly the same as he had the day he’d vanished.

“Remus,” Sirius said softly, and that finally jolted Remus out of his shock. He took a sudden step back, drawing his wand and holding it at the ready; he watched Sirius’ wary eyes follow the movement.

“You can’t be real,” Remus said in a voice that shook. “Who’s idea of a fucking joke is this?”

Sirius held his hands up, placating, though a shadow of a smile crossed his lips for just a heartbeat. 

“I can explain everything,” he said carefully. “I swear it’s me.” 

Unable to resist, Remus stepped closer and lowered his wand, though he did not tighten his white knuckled grip on it. No Glamour could have done this to another man-- Remus would know those gray eyes anywhere. Slowly, Sirius put his hands down, and they stared at each other, the night gone quiet all around them.

“Prove it,” Remus whispered. “Tell me something only you would know.”

“The night I went missing, you were wearing a blue scarf,” Sirius started, closing his eyes for a second like he was picturing it. “I walked you home because we were both too drunk to walk straight, and I-- I kissed you for the first time, right outside your door.” 

“And you never made it home that night.”

Sirius opened his eyes, meeting Remus’, and shook his head. “No, I never made it home at all.”

Without letting himself overthink it, Remus pocketed his wand and stepped even closer. He pulled Sirius into a tight hug. Sirius was stiff for a moment, but then he relaxed into it, his arms coming up to hold Remus just as tight. For a moment, Remus was so relieved to have Sirius back, after all this time, after _years_ spent searching for him and tracking down leads that always turned out to be useless, he almost didn’t realize that something was off.

Sirius felt cold in Remus’ arms, though it was a relatively warm London night and the wind wasn’t even blowing anymore. But, far stranger than that, was how Sirius smelled. In the long years that they’d known each other, Remus had become well-acquainted with Sirius’ smell, and he remembered it well. This was a far different scent, and not because Sirius needed a shower. Remus held Sirius close, his nose in Sirius’ hair, and he breathed in deep.

Slowly, Remus pulled away, slipping his hand into his pocket once more to grip his wand in his sweaty palm. 

“Sirius,” he said carefully, staring hard at him in the darkness. It wasn’t the moonlight that was making Sirius look so pale, Remus realized. And-- and despite his tired eyes, Sirius looked as though he hadn’t aged a day. He looked rather handsome, really, and not a day over 23, though he’d turned 28 last November-- Remus had spent the day getting blackout drunk with James and Peter. “Tell me why you smell like blood.”

“It’s a long story,” Sirius replied, forcing a smile that Remus didn’t believe for a second. “I can explain, but-- maybe we should go inside. I want to know everything I’ve missed--”

“You didn’t run away,” Remus interrupted, thoughts racing. “So many people thought you must’ve run, but I never believed that for a second. I knew that someone had taken you, and I was right, wasn’t I? Seeing you here, it’s like you’ve come back from the dead. And you have, haven’t you?”

Sirius sighed quietly and ran a nervous hand through his tangled hair, refusing to meet Remus’ eyes. 

“I was taken,” Sirius said after a long moment, voice carefully devoid of emotion as he stared past Remus, glaring at the shadows. “I was murdered. And I was brought back.”

Remus was well aware of the fact that he should have his wand out right now, but instead, he withdrew his hand from his pocket and reached out for Sirius again. Sirius’ face was cold to the touch as he leaned into Remus’ caress, closing his eyes. This close, Sirius looked deathly pale, but no less beautiful than he’d ever been.

“A werewolf and a vampire,” Remus said softly, and Sirius’ eyes flew open. “What a pair we make.” 

“Remus, I--” 

“You don’t have to explain right now,” Remus interrupted again, smiling genuinely now. “Let’s go inside.”

 

* * *

 

Ten minutes later, they were settled on Remus’ threadbare old couch with mugs of tea. The shock hadn’t quite worn off yet, Remus supposed-- he couldn’t stop staring at Sirius in awe that he was even there at all, wrapped up in Remus’ old quilt and sipping from the garish yellow mug that Peter had given him for Christmas two years past. He wanted to know everything, wanted to ask a thousand questions, but Sirius had fallen silent and Remus didn’t want to pry.

“James is going to be beside himself when we tell him,” Remus said after the silence had stretched on too long and he’d ran out of tea to keep himself busy with. “We’ve been looking for you the whole time, me and James and Lily and Peter. But, well, James and Lily are busy with the baby now, so it’s just been me still looking.”

“You kept looking, after all this time?” Sirius asked, finally looking up from his tea and looking at Remus. “Wait, hold on, did you just say _baby_?”

“Oh!” Remus grinned, turning on the couch and pulling his feet up under him so he could face Sirius properly. “They named him Harry and he’s just turned three, actually, so I guess he’s not quite a baby anymore. You’ll love him.”

Remus expected Sirius to smile, but he didn’t.

“I’ve missed quite a lot,” Sirius said, with more than a hint of bitterness. He set aside his mug, still half-full, and crossed his arms. “Any kid that came from James and Lily must be wonderful, but I can’t meet him anyway.”

“You can’t?” Remus hesitated, then asked, “Are you-- not planning to stay?" 

“I don’t know,” Sirius answered quietly, looking so defeated that Remus’ heart broke for him. “I don’t want to go, but I can’t be around humans.”

“You know none of us would be scared of you--”

“You _should_ be,” Sirius cut in sharply, and Remus swore that he could see a flash of fangs. “But it’s not that, I knew none of you would give two shits about me being a vampire. It’s just that I-- I can’t be around _any_ humans. I’m still young and I can’t control myself.” 

“Oh.” Slowly, Remus reached out across the small couch and tucked a piece of hair behind Sirius’ ear. “That’s alright, Padfoot, we’ll figure something out. You can still be around me, can’t you?”

“Yes,” Sirius whispered, voice shaking. “Thank Merlin for that.”

Remus smiled softly, then drew closer, gently pulling Sirius against his side. Sirius went easily, sagging against Remus with a quiet sigh.

“I want to tell you everything,” Sirius said quietly, muffled against Remus’ shoulder. 

“You don’t have to.” 

“I owe you an explanation,” Sirius persisted. Remus, unwilling to argue the point because he really _was_ curious about what had happened, said nothing and began to stroke Sirius’ windswept hair. After a moment, Sirius carried on in a voice carefully devoid of emotion. “I was a block away from my flat when I realized I was being followed. I turned and all I saw was the silhouette of a witch with her wand out, and then just-- green light.”

“The Killing Curse?” Remus asked in a hushed voice; he felt Sirius nod.

“I died, and then I woke up what must have been at least a day later, in chains in a dark room, bleeding from my neck.” Sirius took a deep breath. “The change, it-- it takes the better part of a month to take hold. I was kept there, completely alone, until it was complete.”

Despite his sense of foreboding, Remus interjected, “But someone came for you.”

“After a fucking _month_ , she deigned to show herself,” Sirius continued, something dark and angry in his voice now, though he did not move from Remus’ embrace. “It was then that I learned what Bellatrix had been up to since Hogwarts." 

“ _Bellatrix_?” Remus echoed, horrified.

“She had a coven,” Sirius said, sighing quietly and losing the anger he had so briefly built up to. “She wanted her own flesh and blood in it with her to form some sick coven of pureblood wizard vampires, and she gave me no choice in the matter. I tried to escape, but she threatened to send the others after you and James and Lily and Peter, and she had the numbers to do it.”

Remus, caught up in the story, realized that he had stopped stroking Sirius’ hair and began again-- he swore, for a second, he felt the curve of a smile against the skin of his neck. It should unsettle him to be so close to those fangs, but Remus felt no fear at all. On impulse, he leaned down and kissed the top of Sirius’ head.

“I’m sorry,” Sirius whispered, so low that Remus could hardly hear him. “I was a fool and I didn’t believe her, and I tried to escape again.”

“But we’re all alright, she didn’t get to us--” Remus cut himself off suddenly, remembering the night four years ago that had sent him into a panic attack and Pete to St. Mungo’s. “Peter and I were attacked in Hogsmeade, but we thought-- well, we thought it we were just being _mugged_.”

“They didn’t take your money, though, did they?”

“No,” Remus agreed, closing his eyes and trying to forget the way that Pete had screamed. “They took Pete’s finger.”

“I’m glad you both survived,” Sirius said after another long pause, in which Remus tried to wrap his mind around the fact that he’d been attacked by a coven of evil vampires and hadn’t even known what they were.

“Sorry, I’m just… processing.” He took a deep breath. “Sirius, how did you finally escape, then?”

Sirius pulled back, raising his arms to touch Remus’ face with his cold hands, a genuine smile on his face. Somehow, Remus was already adjusting to the strange, bloody scent of Sirius, and he certainly didn’t mind the close proximity.

“Don’t worry,” Sirius said with a grin, looking so very much like his old self that it took Remus’ breath away. “I wasn’t going to risk letting that bitch get to you again. She’s dead.”

“Properly dead?”

“Decapitated,” Sirius replied, and Remus winced at the mental image of Bellatrix with her dark eyes and wild hair, just a bloody head without a body. “I couldn’t get the lot of them, but I took down as many as I could and I left.” 

“You came back to me,” Remus said softly, and Sirius’ smile became something gentler.

“I’ve never been more glad that you’re a werewolf,” Sirius said, and Remus couldn’t help but laugh. “Humans are delicate, but _you_ , you’re made of much sturdier stuff.”

“James would not take well to being called _delicate_ ,” Remus pointed out, and Sirius laughed too-- the sound was so familiar, so _sweet_ , so long-missing from Remus’ life that he had almost forgotten the exact cadence.

“I missed you,” Sirius whispered as their laughter faded away. His hands were still on Remus’ face and they were still so close together, and it felt like it hadn’t been five years since that one single kiss before their lives were uprooted-- it felt like only five minutes ago that Sirius had kissed Remus goodnight.

Sirius shifted closer and Remus closed his eyes.

“I missed you more than you can possibly know,” Remus whispered back.

It was all quiet for a moment, but then-- the sofa made a creaking sound as Sirius shifted his weight, and it was no surprise to Remus at all when he felt soft lips on his own.

It felt almost too good to be true, really, and for just a second, fear gripped Remus’ heart at the thought that this might all be a dream. But Sirius’ hands were sliding into his hair and Sirius’ lips were moving gently against his own, and even in Remus’ best dreams, it had never felt this good. His hands found their way to Sirius’ arms and they both held each other close with shaking hands and muffled sighs.

When they parted, Remus pressed his forehead to Sirius’-- they would be breathing the same air if Sirius still drew breath.

“You should know the things I’ve done to survive,” Sirius whispered. “You know there’s more to the story than what I’ve told you.”

“I don’t need to know it all right now,” Remus replied gently, stroking Sirius’ hair again. “I think maybe we should get some sleep.”

“Remus…” Sirius started.

“I’m just glad you’re home,” Remus whispered, and Sirius kissed him once more.

**Author's Note:**

> Hello, Harry Potter fandom!! I haven't written HP fic since the days of ffn, so it's been uhhh the better part of a decade, and I can't believe I'm back on my bullshit. 
> 
> Obviously, this fic has a lot of potential to be something Big and Deep, but I'm a little too busy with real life now to write that, so... Maybe someday! I have a little bit written of a scene where Remus writes a letter to James, which I might eventually finish. Who knows! 
> 
> Please let me know if you like this! ❤️


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